28 september
posted : (first half of-) Is. 17+18 : Damascus as the matrix gate
… very complicated theme ; it is the matrix copy of the eden gate
(which will be the [restored-] throne room of God , in Revelation) —
but this matrix gate , devised by Adam , will start to fail at the 6th seal
and will finally cease to be during the (7-) Trumpets ;
please know that we do our utmost to tell you as clear as possible the many
aspects we learned about this important theme — and you will excuse our failures

your Majesty … not having the courage to look at you : it just took Too Long ,
the tension between neverending longing and hell days became Too Large ;
if anything matters to you it is the only thing our soul can do —
wrestle through these difficult concepts and hope you will forgive her
[09/29 :]
posted : the complete chapter 17+18 ‘the fall of the matrix gate’ ;
it came out as very readable and offering many cross-readings
[09/30 :]
… when a young boy my old man exploded at me for a poor math grade
and sent me upstairs to redo them ; I sat there for hours , totally confused ,
still not understanding them ; it went dark outside and the window had
remained open so that it was freezing cold inside but I was too in shock :
hours later he entered the room cheerfully saying ‘he was not angry’
and I cried oceans of tears …
incredibly some things don’t seem to change … the ‘math’ is not ‘the text’
because that is going alright but the having to wait in this horrible flesh :
if only ……….


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27 september 22
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1 october 22